The task of discipleship is first a personal journey with God that then overflows into every aspect of life. As followers of Christ, it is our first responsibility to be growing in our relationship and knowledge of God by devoting ourselves to the study of His Word and prayer. Paul calls Christians to discipline themselves for the purpose of godliness implying there is an intentionality to growing in holiness and being like Jesus. This is NOT striving in our own strength to check off a to-do list of spiritual chores but an intentionality that is instead deeply rooted in the understanding we are fully dependent on the Spirit of God to enact such disciplines in our life that lead to knowing him. And in turn, from that overflow, allowing us to lead others to know him.
Here is a sure fact—spiritual growth and discipleship will not happen on accident. Other translations of 1 Timothy 4:7 use the word “train” instead of discipline. Training for godliness is hard work. It’s intentional work. It requires both physical and mental endurance, faithfulness in the seemingly small and insignificant acts of obedience, and saying no to many things that would distract our focus. As parents, we set the tone for discipleship in our homes. It is clear from Jesus’ example that discipleship takes place in intentional times of teaching as well as moments shared in life that present teaching opportunities. Let’s take a look at five areas we can use intentional times of teaching to lead our children in discipleship.
1. We can be intentional in discipleship in our own home by having a time set aside to regularly read the Bible together and pray.
Jesus often pulled his disciples away from the crowds to spend time teaching them Scripture and answering their questions. This was a safe space for them to learn from him, see his heart for people, and come to deeply know their Savior and the mission he was entrusting them with. It’s clear from this example and the instructions from Deuteronomy 6:7 that the Lord expects and requires parents to do the same with the children in their home. There’s no one size fits all or one right one to accomplish this, but there should be a time you gather your family together with consistency to open God’s Word together and pray as a family. This Family Discipleship time creates a place in your home for spiritual conversations to happen as you learn and study the Bible together.
Need help getting started? Sign up to receive my Family Discipleship Guide below.
2. We can be intentional in discipleship in our home by faithfully attending church with our family.
Assembling together consistently with a body of believers is vital to the spiritual health of your family. There’s a reason the author of Hebrews strongly admonishes believers not to forsake gathering together corporately. The church exists for Christians to draw together for preaching, teaching, community, accountability, and most importantly to worship God in unity. Putting ourselves in a position to consistently be taught God’s word strengthens our faith and knowledge of God. We were made to be in community together and when we are, we are able to encourage one another to love and good works. We are able to share struggles with like-minded friends who will lovingly point us to Jesus and speak truth into our lives when we sin. We also have accountability and encouragement to remember the Lord’s faithfulness during trials when we are obedient and faithful in this area.
3. We can be intentional in discipleship in our home by teaching our children to memorize and apply God's Word.
When our children sin, we have ready-made opportunities to share the Gospel with them. In order to capitalize on these moments, we need to be prepared—both parent and child. This takes work, time, and intentionality in training for the moment of discipline. As parents, we need to be experts in the area of childhood sins. And you know what I’ve learned in 7 years of parenting? Discerning their hearts is not so different from discerning my own. Sins are similar, though they manifest differently. As parents, we must be memorizing God’s Word and faithfully teaching it to our children so that when times of discipline come, we are able to together call to mind what God has said. In doing this, we hold God’s Word as the authority by which we discipline and are able to lead them to Biblical repentance and forgiveness.
4. We can be intentional in discipleship in our home by using God's Word to teach our children Godly character and Biblical worldview.
We live in a culture that wants to make everything subjective to individual preference. Anything you feel is right if you want it to be. ‘You do you’ is the popular cultural phrase and reigning cultural mantra. Morality is subjective to interpretation. Lines that used to firmly separate right and wrong and good and evil are now blurred. Truth is relative. Godly virtues and character have been replaced with individual value systems. This isn’t Biblical. Godly character is learned from Jesus’ example. Truth is learned from the Bible alone. God sets the boundaries of what is good, evil, right, and wrong. If we fail to do our job of teaching Biblical truth in our homes, our children will be led astray by these cultural views. We must talk with our children about godly virtues and character and hold them in the highest esteem in our home. We must diligently teach them how our culture contradicts Biblical worldview. For most parents, this is going to take intense study to learn it ourselves before we can teach it to our children.
5. Lastly, we can be intentional in our home by teaching our children Biblical theology.
That’s right—parents can learn to teach Biblical theology. The world is full of false teaching and people who will seek to lead our children astray. It’s always been this way—as evidenced in so many New Testament letters where the writers plead with new believers not to fall prey to false teaching. We have the opportunity to teach our children of God—but in order to teach, we must know him ourselves. The Bible is full of divine mysteries God reveals to us as we are faithful to the discipline of Bible reading and study. Thankfully, we only have to be one step ahead of our kids in this journey and there are many good tools to help in this process. Check out the recommendation links for suggestions.
One of the greatest challenges we face in parenting is not allowing the busyness of the days and weeks and even many good things to rob us of these intentional moments of training our children. They are in our home for a short window of time and we are battling for their hearts and minds against a culture that would have them for its own pleasure. Let us be wise with our time, knowing the days are fleeting, and constantly remind them that this world is not forever, Jesus is our only hope for salvation, and lasting joy and satisfaction is found only in a right relationship with God.
Closing Thoughts:
- Are you reading God’s Word together as a family regularly? If yes, how can you use this time more effectively? If no, what small step can you take today to get started?
- Do you attend and serve a local Bible-teaching church? If no, who is a friend you can contact and attend with this Sunday? Call them today!
- What is the main sin struggle for each of your children? With your child—in a calm moment where the struggle is not on display—discuss, write down, and memorize a verse together that speaks to that particular struggle.
Parent-Led Discipleship Part 1: Discipleship in Your Home
Parent-Led Discipleship Part 2: An Ominous Warning